Union

Marriage is a sacred union between one man and one woman

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[This may appear as a bonus post, because I crossed the international date line today so this is my second run through Friday 9 June 2018.]

Read: Deuteronomy 22

If a man is found sleeping with another man’s wife, both the man who slept with her and the woman must be put to death. You must purge this evil from Israel. (Deuteronomy 22:22)

Reflect:

God takes marriage very seriously. His instructions for the people of Israel reflect that. In this chapter, Moses warns against a number of evils:

A husband who decides he doesn’t like his wife must not lie about her to others and he is not to divorce her (22:13-19). A bride who is found to not be a virgin (obviously this does not apply to widows marrying a second time) shall be stoned to death (22:20-21). Adultery is punishable by death also (22:22). Consensual sex outside of marriage is punishable by death (22:23-24). If a woman engaged to be married is raped, her attacker shall be put to death (22:25-27). If an unmarried, unengaged woman is raped, the attacker must pay a massive fine, but they are to be married and he may never divorce her (22:28-29). A man may not marry his father’s wife (22:30).

Without contraception and protection from STDs, these laws provided for the protection of the vulnerable, including women and any children born from a forced sexual union. However, the biggest messages from these laws are the sanctity and sacredness of marriage, the immense importance of the one flesh union, and the seriousness of sexual sin which would harm this one flesh union.

Though the laws of my county differ sharply, as a Christian and as a wife I must recognise my marriage is precious in God’s eyes – and live accordingly.

crux:

Marriage is a sacred union between one man and one woman.

Respond:

LORD God Almighty,

Thank you for the huge blessing and privilege of my marriage relationship with Jeff. Thank you for enabling us to keep our marriage bed pure and undefiled for nearly 18 years of wedded joy.

Thank you for Jeff’s faith, for his sacrificial love for me, for his compassionate care for our children and for his desire to serve you by serving your people as a pastor.

LORD, please help Jeff while I am away (and when I return) to remain faithful to you, to me, to our children and to our church. May he have the strength and patience, insight and kindness to love and lead in our marriage, our family and our church in a way that brings glory to Jesus.

Amen.

Sharing

Sex is about sharing my body with my spouse

Read: SongĀ of Songs 7

[He] May your breasts be like clusters of grapes on the vine,
the fragrance of your breath like apples,
and your mouth like the best wine.
[She] May the wine go straight to my beloved,
flowing gently over lips and teeth. (Songs 7:8-9)

Reflect:

This chapter shows the enormous beauty and joy to be found in the love between a husband and his wife. They delight in each other’s bodies and delight also in sharing their body with the other. This is the joy of give-and-take in a marriage, which is true joy.

Marriage is not about catch-and-snatch: luring another person in to some sort of sexual honeypot trap and then stealing from them sexually. Rather, the sexual side of marriage is about enjoying each other together, being generous towards the other.

As Paul says (1 Corinthians 7:4) “The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but yields it to his wife.” In yielding, we are ceasing to rule over ourselves and learning the joy of mutual submission and sharing our most private self.

Crux:

Sex is about sharing my body with my spouse.

Respond:

LORD God Almighty,

I must admit I’m shy to be talking with you about this topic, but you’ve initiated the conversation by including it in your holy Scriptures. Shy as I am, I have to thank you for opening up the topic.

You have showed me in your word that sex between married spouses is intended to be a physically delightful thing to be shared and enjoyed together. Please may it always be so between my husband Jeff and me.

Thank you for your good creation and your good created order. Please help us to always keep to the joy you offer us within your created order. Do not let us overstep our bounds.

Please also help us to use your words to talk with our teenage children about righteous sex in marriage so they may value it for their future but not overstep and seek to steal it too early.

Amen.